I went there, sat there,
stood there, waited there, even begged there for something,
anything to happen.
It was a Thursday,
and in the dying moments of day, when the last rays
of light stood up to be killed in the sky, I could feel
someone behind me, just to the side. I could feel a
presence, a shadow, standing just obscured behind a
I turned around.
"Rube?" I asked. "That
But it wasn't Rube.
I was sitting down
against the small brick fence when I saw the person
step into the last remnants of light, and walk slowly
toward me. It was Octavia.
It was Octavia and
she walked over and sat next to me.
"Hi Cameron," she said.
"Hi Octavia." I was
Silence bent down then,
just for a moment, and whispered to each of us.
My heart threw itself
to my throat.
She looked into the
window I'd been staring at. Stephanie's window.
"Nothing?" she asked,
and I knew what she meant.
"No, not tonight,"
I couldn't help it.
I promise you, I couldn't..
A huge stupid tear
rose up and fell out of my eye. It stammered down my
face to my mouth and I could taste it. I could taste
the saltiness of it, on my lips.
I looked at her.
"You okay?" she asked.
And all I did from
there was tell her the truth.
I said, "She's not
comin' out tonight, or any other night, and there's
nothing I can do about it." I was even moved to quote
Rube. "Y' feel what y' feel, and that girl doesn't feel
a thing for me. That's all there is to it.." I looked
away, at the dying sky, attempting to pull myself together.
I began wondering exactly
why I'd chosen this Glebe girl as the one I wanted to
please, to drown in.
"Cam?" asked Octavia.
She kept wanting me
to look at her, but I still wasn't ready. Instead, I
stood up and stared into the house. The lights went
on. The curtains were drawn, and the girl, as always,
was nowhere to be seen.
Yet, there was a girl
next to me, who'd stood up now as well, and we were
both beside the brick fence. She looked at me and made
me look back. She asked one more time.
Finally, I answered,
quietly, timidly. "Yeah?"
And Octavia's face cried out to me in the silent city
night as she asked, "Would you come and stand outside
my house instead?"